Noos ewe all kens wit az am like, az pure loves all udder annemals, esspesshally the babes varr eye etty. Anways, az wiz wiff ma pussee cat pals Stan and Hilda last nites in the living rooms, that wiz rite cool, coz az finks Hilda pure fancies mee. Az wiz tellin them that az wiz lookin forward tae thiz weekends coz ma Dads hooman sistur iz comin tae stay wiff uz and shee haz a dug and a cat. Theys are called Broose and Mallee or sumfin. Broose is a cat and Mallee iz a dug - a babe dug. Theys are Inglish, but az widnae hold that against thems, in fact az widnae hold anyfin against thems. LOL. LOL, fur unedducated peepells meens Lots of Love az finks. Ma Mum says it stands fur Laffin oot Loud, but am no sure aboot that. Anyways az wiz gettin masell all reddee fur Bruce and Malllees visit, az wiz cleenin oot ma bits, if ewe kens wit a meens. Like ma eers and fings. But ewes will no beeleeve it, it noo turns oot that Bruce and Malleee iz no comin tae stae wiff uz. Az wiz rite upset and az asked why theys are no cumin. Ma Mum said that ma bruvers and sisturs wid eet Broose the cat and Mallee couldnae come tae visit eiver, coz Mallee wiz a sort of Dash hound. Wit the blazzes iz a Dash hound? See ma Mollee iz a Dash hound two shee pure Dashes aroond the gerdin at 190 mph. Then az rememburs that az could look up a Dash hound on the World Wide Spiders Webb fing. OMG az couldnae beelevee wit az wiz seein. It wiz a Sossage Dug!!! Az swears tae ma sell, a dug made fae sossages. FANTASTICK. How cool iz that.
But ma Mum says thats why Mallee cannee come an visit, coz all ma bruvers and sisters pure loves sossages and that widnae bee fare on the wee dug, tae bee covered in salt and peppers, and pure eetin fur dinner. See noo, az pure widnae allow that tae happin. See az am a veggeetareean, but ma brovers and sisturs arenae.
So az will jist sit in ma prizon cell and no speek tae anybuddee, fur at leest 5 minutes. So there.
Az will let ewe kens if any dug ever iz pure aloud tae visit mee.
Love big Presley the vegggeetareean fillosifer. xxx
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