Bloo Seep

Hullo everyboddees, az am up reelee earlee today coz its gettin neer Kissmass time an mee and Mollees iz pure excited. Well ma Roobee iz mutch better todays, az didnae ken wit wiz wrang wiff hur, shee wiz actin like ma Dad diz efter hee's haz had a foo drinks - like pure confoosed.
Noo wees iz confoosed coz wees didnae ken wit wiz up wiff hur.
Noo az promised ewes ah wid tells ewes a funnee storee and az swears tae masell this iz the troof. Sum readers may find the content of this storree pure shockin.
See wit happined wiz this. Mee and Mollee wur oot in the car wiff ma Mum a foo weeks ago and wees wur drivin doon the road past all the seeps in the fields. Mee and Mollee pure shout aboose at the seeps by tellin them that a woolf iz behind thems, its reelee funnee and Mollee giggells all the times. Anyways, next fing az saw and a swear tae masell thiz iz the troof, az pure seen a seep wearing loads of leather straps on his body! He looked like hee wiz makin wan of they pure rood movies. Az fot it wiz called a Bandage Movie, but am no sure if its called that, coz ah had a bandage once and it wiznae made of leather. Well, this wan seep wiff the leather geer on, wiz playin leep frog wiff all the udder seeps in the feeld. He wiz havin a pure ball. But thiz iz the rood bit, coz ewe widnae beelevee wit he did behind the seeps backs when hee played leep frog. Hee wiz pure sprayin them wiff bloo paint. Az said oh no sh... a brick, wits hee dane that fur, an az wiz shoutin at the seeps tryin tae tell them, but theys fot az wiz cryin woolf again and theys all ignored mee. A foo days later wees past this feeld again and ewe will no beelevee wit az seen. Every last wan of the seeps in the feeld had bloo paint on thems, honest they did. So that seep in the leather geer, had pure played leep frog wiff every last wan of thems. Noo wit az want tae know iz how diz hee tell all hiz babes apart, coz they all looks the sames tae mee. Az finks hee should have painted them different colors tae tell thems apart.
Wee Mollee jist pure giggled all the times when shee seen all the bloo seep. So if ewes sees any bloo seep or udders wiff paint on them, ewes will ken theys have bin playin leep frog wiff the seep in the Bandage geer. Rite, am off tae find a tin of bloo paint. Molleee, oh Molleee, where are ewe. Love and peese from King Presley xxxx