Ssssnow way man

Hullo all ewes ma fans out there. Noo ma englilish isnae very good, so maybees az should have rit, hullo all ewes ma fannees out there. Az will check ma grammur later so az didnae offend anyones. Well see fing iz, mee and Mollee have bin playin in the exercise yard here at Lan Ark, coz its pure covered in snow. Wees pure loves the ssnow, well no the yellow ssnow and wees reelee hates the brown ssnow. Wizzy always seems tae bee neer brown ssnow, so az finks he likes it! So az wiz talkin tae ma Mum and she said shee wid build mee and Mollee a ssnow man, but az didnae want a ssnow man, so az asked her if she wid help mee and Mollee build a ssnow dug. She said she wid, but she pure hasnae, coz she haz bin pure running all over the country wiff hur work. Shee is like oot at work fur like aboot 30 hours in wan day, to helps udder peepells who are pure sad.
So fing iz shee iz gettin wur udder noo car todays, coz the windaes have bin pure blacked oot in it noo, so shee can use it fur hur work. Shee bott the car in Engerland, where shee goes tae work. Az finks she wid have bin better bying a ssnow mowbeel tae drive up and down to Engerland in, but no, shee fott shee pure kent better and bott a car. Wit a tube!!
Shee said shee wid build wur ssnow dug twomorrows if shee isnae two bizee, but az finks az will ask my sycho Dad tae build mee wan, coz hee jist pure sits aboot all day and stares at hiz compootur.
Az will tell ewes all wit wur noo car iz like when ma Mum gets homes frum Engerland tonites.
Have a nice days and az will speek tae ewes all later, coz az have a rite funee storee tae tell ewes.
Love fae Big Presley the King xxx