Ha Ley Loo Yah!

Hullo everyboddees, az hope ewes iz az happee az mee!
Noo let mee tells ewes a troo storee and ah swears tae masell this is the troof, but its so good ah dont fink even ma most loyal fannees will beeleeve mee.
See fing iz ah used tae beeleeve in Angels, eye its troo, but then ah sent wan of ma Angels tae ma Antee Noras. And ewes will no beeleeve it. Ma Angel couldnae even find hur wae tae Edinburger. Noo fing iz is if shee cannee look efter hersell, wit chance haz she got lookin efter ma Antee Noras. So ah pure sacked that Angel, and ah said tae Molllee ah didnae beeleeve in Angels anymores. Ma Mollee said it wiznae the Angels falt that shee got lost. Mollee finks postman pat wiz jizt probably playin wiff hiz pusseee cat and forgot tae delivers wur letteur.
Anyways, yisterday, Mee and Mollee wiz at the sopps, fur tae bye sum sopping at the pet sopp. Az wees wur walkin tae the pet sopp ah looked intae the windae of an udder sopp and ah fot all ma kismmasses had come at once. Ewes will no beeleeve wit theys wur sellin. Noo thiz iz the troof and ewes can check it oot fur yersells. This sopp wiz sellin......trees!! Eye trees, but wate wan minit no jizt any auld trees, like the wans wee dugs use tae pee pee on. These wur magic trees!! Honest!! Theys had a big notice beside them and it says 'Grow yer own Plums'!!!
Ah swear tae masell that is pure 100000% the troof. Ah pure yelled Ha Ley Loo Ya, fae the top of ma heed. Ah checked oot ma pocket monee, but ah only had eenuff monee tae bye wan tree, but az only need too plums, so ah hope wan tree will bee eenuff. Noo between ewe an mee, ah finks thiz iz wan big monee makin scam by the Vets. See they pure remove a dugs plums when theys are no lookin and pit them in jars. Then they sell the 'grow yer an plums' trees next tae the pet sopp, so wees dugs will rush in an bye them. So in a foo monffs ah will have ma ane plums! Ah will let ewes ken wit theys are like, but rite noo am off tae fank the angels fur pure listen tae ma prayers! Ha Ley Loo Yah!!
An also tae fank them fur lookin efter ma Antee Noras. Ah loves ewe Antee Noras.
Buy for noo, big Presley the King - who will have hiz an plums soon xxxxxxxxxxx