Its Rabbee Burns Dae!

Hullo everybodees, its mee big Presley, or fur ma fannees, ewes can call mee Preslee Burns todae!
Noo see fur all ewes undedoocated peepells oot there, todae is Rabbee Burns dae, and ah fink az am related tae him. Ah fink hee wiz ma grate, grate, grate, grate grandfather or sumfin. Noo wate wan minit, az kens wit ewes are finkin. Ewes are finkin that az am only sayin that coz hee iz neerlee as famoose az mee. But that iz no troo. See fing iz, have ewes ever red any of hiz poemms, coz if ewes have, ewes will see that hee pure spells everyfin like mee. Ah swears tae masell hee diz. If ewes are no familiar wiff hiz poemms, hear iz a reemindur of wit hee rote, and ewes will see there iz a familee reesemblense.
My Love is like a Read Read rose - thiz wiz rit fur ma Mollee and ma Rag and all ma udder babes.
Address fur tae send the Haggiss - thiz wiz rit fur Bazil, coz he iz a fat man.
Auld Langs Wine - wiz rit fur Wizzy Wong.
Hollee Willees Prayer - ah dont fink az should say who he rit this wan fur, but ewes can fink aboot it yersells.
and last but no leest.. 'To a Moose' - that wiz rit fur ma Mollee, coz shee pure kills all the mice.
Noo ewes can see why az iz reelated tae Rabbee Burns, and az will bee havin ma Haggiss tonites and ma Dad can have the Wiskee.
So when ewes have a drink tae Rabbee Burns tonite, ewe can have a piece of toast fur mee too.
Have a rite nice Presley Burns Dae, all ma loves Big Presley xxxxxx