Fanks

Deer everyboddes, az jizt wanted tae tell ewes an udder storee.
See fing iz thiz, diz ewe rememburs that ah wiz pure ill a foo daes ago and ah said no tae send mee get well King Presley kards. Well sum of ma fannees were so socked at reedin that ah wiz so pure ill that they didnae reed that bit! Coz ewes will no beeleeve wit Postman Pat brung mee.
Hee pure brung mee the followin eyetems, sent tae mee frum ma fannneees.
Numbur Wan: An Eye patch!
Numbur Too: A get Well Kard fur ma Vet
Turd Fing: Free stickee plasturs
Numbur Fore: A packit of poo bags - fur ma Vet
A dont fink there wiz a numbur five fing:
Numbur Sex: A white stick fur tae move around wiff
Numbur Sevin: A bondage
Numbur Ate: Ten pence
and ewes will no beeleeve wit Number Ten wiz!: A plastick parrott fur tae pit on ma shoulder!
Ma Molleee wiz pure laffin when shee seen wit ah had got, coz shee fot theys fings wur reelee funnee.
So ah wid jizt like tae say a big fank ewe fur sendin mee these fings, but in footure jist send the monee pleese.
Ah am mutch bettur todaes fank ewe, but auld Wizzy isnae dane too well.....but beefore ewes all rush oot tae send him fings, jist contact mee first and ah will start a pockit monee fund fur him coz hee iz ma pal.
Have a nice dae, lots of love fae big Presley the King xxxxx