EMERGENSEE YELL

As cannee believe az have had to wait awe day for a wee shot on ma compootar, cos az have reallee important informashon for all the dugs and beetches oot there.

Ewes must all know the story aboot the 'boy who cried wolf', that wiz a right funny story, me and the molls had a right good laff aboot how stoopid the boy wiz. See, I tells ma Molls that she shouldnae tell any lies, cos Mum & Dad will no beeleeve hur when shes is telling the troof. Me on the other paw, well I fot of a way aroond this problem, and az is going to share my seekret with ewes, so that ewes didnae get cot oot like the boy who cried wolf.

Right this is what I wants ewes all tae do. Ewes have to have different sounding yells to get yur Mum & Dads attenshon. Pick aboot 3 or 4 different yells, cos ewes dinnae want to huv too many or your stoopid parents will no be able to tell the difference. Ma Mum calls ma yells, barks! Barks, that wid be a good name for ma Mums pal Tree!
Az have wan yell fur when as is hungree, wan yell fur when as needs a pee, and wan for an emergensee! Ma Mum calls this ma cliping bark, cos a huv had tae use it when ma Molls is doin somefin right bad. Ma F....Mum kens ma different barks, and if she knows as is hungree or just needin a pee she just wanders in tae see me, like there is nae rush. Thats why a hud tae develop ma third yell, and when as does this, ewes wid think that someone had shoved a ton of rocket fuel behind her!! I laff when as see's her runnin like that, wi a look of sheer horrur on her face....its priceless and so funnee.

Noo I like to keeps ma emergency yell for real important things, like when Molls does somefin rang and I wants to see her gettin into bother from Mum. But wan day it kinda all went a bit rang fur me. Wit happen wiz this, as wiz playin hide and seek with ma Molls. I did the hiding and she did the seeking. So I fund a right cool place to hide. As decided to hide up on the unit in the wee room aft oor prison cell. (I think ma Mum calls it a utility room, when she is tryin to impress her poor pals). Anyways, as jumps up on to the unit, cos underneaf the unit is the washin machines! Aye wee's has two washin machines, cos wee's didnae want oor blankets washed in wey ma Dads socks, cos they stink! Ma Mum had left a basket thing fool of washin, so I wiz hiding behind that.

I wiz laffin like mad, cos ma Molls couldnae fund me and she wiz getting right upset, cos she is nae good at this game. Wit the ....... dae ewes think she went and did....only, went off in the huff and went moose huntin and left mee's hiding ma sell. Noo, ah dont know if any of ewes have ever tried to play hide and seek yersel, but its no fun. Its a bit like the time a played Eye Spy on ma ane, and a lost! So, I fot right thats it, as is never playin wey you again Molls, but a hud a wee problem. Cos as wiz stuck and as couldnae get back doon. I fought OMG, wit the ....... am a go nae dae noo. As stood fur ages tryin tae work oot how I wiz gonae get doon wey oot help from ma Molls. Then I fought I wid dae ma EMERGENSEE YELL. Wey hey...aye a noo it wid work, cos I heard ma Mum run like a bat oooot of hell. Then in a right split second, as thoughts to ma sell, OMG, az is go tae get into a right load of bover and as will end up back in the cooler. So I shut up!! But Mum was on a mission, but fankfoolee she didnae see me. She ran right past me and oot the back door! She did this aboot 3 or 4 times, and she wiz callin ma name. Oh no, wit the ...... should ah dae! She came runnin back in again, and then she saw me!! I just knows ma Molls only gone and telt her where as wiz hidin.

I didnae speak to ma Molls for a whole minute efter she dobbed me in, cos as wiz put in the cooler, but the right funny thing wiz, Mum put Molls in the cooler too. Am no sure if ma Mum will run as fast next times as have tae dae an Emergensee Yell, and if she disnae, it will be all Mollys fault. Moral of the story to all ewes dugs & beetches oot there, only use the Emergensee Yell if it is a reel emergensee!!
Big Presley has left the building cos as is takin care of ma ane business x